Thursday, October 4, 2007

Our Morning-Part 2

O.K....thanks for the e-mails this morning, my friends! I picked Ella up and she seemed happy with all of her art projects. She falls asleep on the way home and when she is napping I unload her backpack and find the diaper I had packed was missing. I promised her before she went in school that I would come to school and change the diaper if she had poopies. I PROMISED! The teacher and director were aware of this and told me they would. But when the time came...they took matters into their own hands and told her I was too far away(Ella told me that) and they would change her. Ella will not protest or even cry around people she does not know well. Ella learned very early on to internalize her negative feelings. Why cry when no one will meet my needs? The reality of living in an institution when she was a baby. It took her a looong time to cry in front of us and it took a lot of work on our end to help her heal from her past traumas. We worked with an awesome trauma therapist that helped us bring Ella to the secure point she is at now. It took a good year for her to truly trust us and here I am in her eyes breaking a promise.

Loud noise does bother her... alot! But instead of crying...she sits there with that deer in the headlights look. Because she doesn't cry or tantrum...the teacher tries to tell me she is fine with noise. Because she didn't resist the teacher changing her diaper....I am sure they are thinking that it is all good. Well, it's not. It bothered her and she refused to even talk about it for a while after I first asked.
So, I have a nice long letter ready to go out to the teacher. Why, oh why do schools feel as if all children were made from the same exact mold?


1 comment:

Donna Geer said...

I had been praying for you today & am sad the teachers took it in their own hands to break your promise to Ella. I know how this can set traumatized little ones back. :( To them it is not a big deal, to Ella I am sure it is huge. I am sure you will make your point FULLY known at the school.
Many blessings,

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